Character Dimensions - FEAR Dimension (Part 1): DAY 182
Character
Dimensions – (Practical Application: Part 20)
The
FORCE - continued
The
Chicken or the Egg??? – continued
How
the Fruit of Life became Rotten – continued
Who
I Am as Money – continued
(To read this post, it
must be understood that we’re walking this process/Blog - Heaven's Journey to
Life multi-dimensionally, which means – each post covers one dimension, but is
interconnected into/as multi-dimensions in our process of walking the
point/question of “who I am” and how this “I” created/manifested this entire
physical existence. Thus, suggested – to read this Blog from DAY 1, as many of
the points in previous dimensions/DAYS/posts are always brought-through into
the next days/dimensions/posts as all the dimensions interconnect as the multi-dimensionality
we’ve created/manifested as our separation as Energy/Consciousness from/of
Life/equality and Oneness. Thus, if one is faced with this post, and have not
yet read this Blog from DAY 1 - suggest that self first start from DAY 1, as
otherwise one will have no context of many dimensions that is walked in this
post, that has been dealt with in detail in previous posts.)
We’re in and from this Post having a walk-through of the
CONSEQUENCE and FEAR Dimensions, as well as the REDEFINING Process, with having
walked through the Thought, Imagination, Backchat, Reactions and
Physical/Behaviour Dimension of the Personality/Character as we have taken the
Postponement Character/Personality.
Now, with the FEAR Dimension – here one want to have a
walk-through Memories regarding finding any
past-experiences/relationships/moments where one’s Postponement Character
activated/started, what are the most ‘emphasized’ memories that come up within
self when having a look back at when the Postponing within oneself and one’s world
started. And what one will find with regards to Personalities – is that the
Origin will always be a FEAR, as Personalities are essentially systems/personas
of the Mind
that protect the self-interest of ENERGY. So, if one have a look at for
example the Postponement Character, it protect/validate the Self-Interest of
the Mind for that Positive Energy Experience of the SOMETHING ELSE, and in so
doing compromise/sabotage self’s relationship to self, the physical body and so
one’s world/reality.
Thus, what I had found for example with the Postponement
Character/Personality with having a look at the FEAR Dimension, was within
childhood, where I was / as a
child experienced doing obligations such as washing dishes / cleaning my
room as me ‘missing out on’ being able to PLAY outside / HAVE FUN with what
I WANT TO DO / Experience within it. And within School as well – having to
do Homework when I actually want to go outside and PLAY that the experience of
me doing WHAT I WANT TO DO was more
FUN than what was told to me to do / that I experienced as being forced to
do / obliged to do. All of which primarily comes down to Children not being
educated / explained with regards to the Nature of Responsibility, it’s more
like “Stop playing / you have to now do this/that”, without explaining to the
Child WHY it is important to do the homework/cleaning, what are the implications/consequence
of NOT doing it, and already within the early years of the child implement
structure in terms of “this is work time and this is play time”. I mean, for
years – children
essentially just “have fun” with no realistic perspective of reality / the
responsibilities within it. So, essentially it would be beneficial to
already from a really young age implement a balance between responsibility and
play/entertainment.
In this, what I have found is that anything that would thus
resemble responsibility/obligation – I would resist and immediately go into the
original Fear of “Missing Out” on what I WANT /I WANT TO HAVE. Which within
this is essentially the self-interest
that develop in children that solely for the primary first years only
consider their WANTS in regarding play/fun/the positive energy of experience
and then suddenly/unexpectedly exposed to the world of responsibility/obligation
and consequence. And so developed the Postponement Character/Personality which
will protect/defend/validate what I WANT as an energy experience of SOMETHING
ELSE/SOMETHING BETTER and not tend to responsibilities/obligations that will
have a physical-reality Consequence. And in this: what we tend to miss then is
only going for the I WANT and not seeing, realising and understanding the real
consequential implications of me always wanting my WANTS and not considering my
relationship to me, to others, to my world and especially my Future.
So, within the
FEAR Dimension – this may initially be more difficult to identify, equally
as with the THOUGHT Dimension. Because, one really have to look at what one is
in fact doing in the act of the Personality/Character – meaning, breaking it
down to the Basics – with having a look at the Postponement
Character/Personality: It’s that one go into the Nature of WHAT I WANT, instead
of what is HERE as Responsibility within considering self and all other’s
involved within self and self’s World.
But, Primarily, the Framework one can Utilize here – is to
have a look at what Self-Interest the Personality/Character protect/defend. As
we Identified here, the Self-Interest is DOING SOMETHING ELSE, essentially WHAT
I WANT, and have a look at where within one’s life one Developed a FEAR
as and for the Character/Personality, such as what we Identified here with the
Postponement Character/Personality – Fearing ‘Missing Out’ / ‘Fear of losing MY
WANT’ / ‘Fear of Losing an Energy
Experience’ etc.
So, what we suggest here with the THOUGHT Dimension and FEAR
Dimension identification, if/as one get stuck in any Way and/or can’t initially
identify them – to Visit the Desteni Forums Here,
and we’ll assist/support with Guiding you through the Process of how to
Identify the THOUGHT and FEAR Dimensions more practically within the context of
the Personality/Character that you’re facing/walking.
Once the FEAR Dimension
is Identified, one assist/support self with the Process of Writing,
Self-Forgiveness and Self-Commitments:
FEAR Dimension:
Writing
Here, we’ll utilize the example of realising the Childhood Fear
of having faced a Responsibility/Obligation of Homework/Dishes/Cleaning the
room, as for example:
I realised that as a
Child, with facing responsibilities/obligations such as homework/cleaning the
room/washing dishes that I would experience a Fear, and within that a
resistance as all I could think about was me WANTING to play/have fun/go
outside and that me having to tend to a responsibility/obligation would “take
that away from me”, losing MY WANT. And so see, realise and understand how I
had throughout my Life developed this Postponement Character, because through
Postponement – I could have MORE of MY WANT, and regarding my
responsibilities/obligations, can give that 10% attention or no attention at
all, that I would even go to the extent of not doing them at all and
sabotage/compromise many opportunities throughout my life without a ‘care’
because my ‘care’ had been focussed on the
attention of MY WANTS, even at the cost/expense of my life in this
World/Reality.
FEAR Dimension:
Self-Forgiveness
I
Forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to, as
a Child and up until now – not understand my relationship to
obligation/responsibility as I had initially come into the World and for a
couple of years experienced only my relationship to myself, developing
essentially a primary personality of who I am to/towards what I experienced ‘positively’,
and then when/as I was introduced to obligation/responsibility – I did not have
a mechanism/process in my Mind/myself in how to establish a relationship to
obligation/responsibility as I had already vested within me a who I am
to/towards what I ENJOY, and obligation/responsibility and the nature of it did
not FIT into and as my Mind’s relationship/personality of Fun/Enjoyment/Play.
In this, I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and
allowed myself to see, realise and understand how, as a Child, I remember
facing a moment of the process of cleaning my room / washing dishes / doing
homework and I REALLY did not WANT to do it. Because I immediately within me
had an imagination/image of me playing outside / doing SOMETHING ELSE and it’s
like that moment in reality of facing the responsibility/obligation hit me with
the realisation that: I can’t go and do MY WANT, I have to/tend to the
Responsibility/Obligation and that I would be MISSING OUT on what I usually
could do “freely”.
In this, I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and
allowed myself to see,
realise and understand that coming into the world and living
in the world for a moment in my own “personal heaven”, and not being
structurally introduced to obligation/responsibility, that – when/as I was
suddenly/unexpectedly introduced to obligation/responsibility especially within
the ways it was approached as being “told to do it” / “how it was enforced”,
that I would divert my reaction to/towards the parent/peer/teacher
as “blaming them for taking away MY WANT” / “Losing MY WANT” as going out to
play/doing that SOMETHING ELSE. Not seeing, realising and understanding that my
reaction to the parent/peer/teacher is in fact originating from an
inner-conflict within me with Not Understanding/Comprehending the WHY and the Consequence/Responsibility
of me having to tend to the responsibilities/obligations, because all that I am
understanding as a Child is MY WANTS, MY EXPERIENCES and facing this
responsibility/obligation was like, MY WANTS/MY EXPERIENCES being taken away
from me and that it’s the parent/peer/teacher’s “Fault”.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to,
as a Child, interpret responsibility/obligation as an action/process of it “taking
away” / “me losing” MY WANTS and MY EXPERIENCES that I LIKE, without seeing,
realising, understanding and comprehending that I am living in this world with
other human beings, that I am living in this world where my actions,
responsibilities and obligations will determine the nature of my relationships
with others, and also my future in this World. And so, I forgive myself that I
haven’t accepted and allowed myself to consider the practical
implications/consequence and responsibility with doing/tending to obligations
IN REALITY, but only vested
my interest in MY WANTS/MY EXPERIENCES.
I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself
to as a child, see,
realise and understand that obligations/responsibilities was not taking
anything away from me / that I wasn’t ‘losing’ anything, that – yes, in that
moment / for the moment it was me having to place MY WANT on hold for a moment
or even to the next day, but as a Child I created a relationship with TIME
as NOW, and so in that NOW moment of having to tend to a
responsibility/obligation instead of doing MY WANT, it was interpreted in the
context of me “missing out” / “losing” MY WANT.
I forgive
myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see, realise and understand
how I Still – from childhood up to now, accept and allow myself to react in
aversion/resistance to responsibility/obligation within and as the Fear of me
missing out / me not getting/having WHAT I WANT, and so in this, accepted and
allowed such a relationship to be/become a living condition, even into and as
the Evolution of the Postponement Character/Personality, to
justify/excuse/validate me getting/having MY WANTS and not caring/considering
for the consequences I am in fact accumulating in me and my
world/relationships with not seeing, realising and understanding the
implications of responsibility/consequence, that extend beyond only ‘My Wants,
needs and desires’.
We will in the next post continue with the Self Forgiveness
and Self Commitment Statements in having a look at also the Dimensions of WANT
and how we’ve individually and collectively always placed our Wants before
responsibility/consideration of others in our worlds, essentially Humanity
still Children that hasn’t matured with not being able to consider/regard
others as self and our responsibility in this world, not only to ourselves but
EVERYONE as ourselves.
Featured Art Work by Sylvia Overschot-Gerssen
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Thanks, cool background information for postponement.