The Final Stand: DAY 456
The other night, as I was preparing to rest, I looked at
some of the challenging points I have faced throughout my process. More
specifically – how many times I had fallen within those points until I
eventually stood up; stopped the falling and simply continued standing.
This is the point I’d like to discuss/share within this
interview and I’m going to take it from a point to take into consideration that
I have personally learned within/throughout my process: There comes a time when
you face a challenging point inside yourself/your life where you do the
writing, forgiveness and commitments and face the final process of change where
you change your living application and push through the transformation from consciousness
pre-programming to self-aware
living. But, when it comes to that final process of change…we often fall,
fall so hard that we fall right back to where we started initially as we sat
ourselves down and did the writing/forgiveness/commitments. Then we breathe,
pull ourselves together again and start all over – sometimes we don’t go back
to the drawing-board of investigation/introspection in
writing/forgiveness/commitments to specify our practical living change process
from the pre-programming to self-aware living and this can cause one to ‘fight
with oneself’ within/during the practical living change process – which just
perpetuate the internal and/or external challenge that we’re facing. In this
process, we get into this ‘groove’ of falling, standing up, falling, standing
up, falling,
standing up – and when I looked at my personal process I had walked, what I
found is that this very point of falling-standing up can become an accepted and
allowed relationship in the Mind, a self-definition, another hurdle/backdoor in
the mind/inside self to not pull a challenging point through to actual change.
Where we get ‘used to’ this conditioning of accepting/allowing falling-standing
up-falling-standing up within ONE POINT over and over and over again that we
don’t step back for a moment and go “wait a minute, I’m walking in circles here
– the process should go falling-learning-standing up,
falling-learning-standing up – with each phase of this equation actually
stepping-stones to/towards the final stand, where the process of learning from
the mistakes/falling comes to an end and you simply stand.”
I looked at so many challenging points I faced and how often
I had gotten into this ‘funk’ of falling-standing when I could have actually
just stood / really went for it and just not fall. I likened it to where we’re
on an island and we have to swim from one island to the next. We start
swimming, this being the practical living change process, where we had before
going for the swim – already physically prepared ourselves, which would be the writing/forgiveness/commitments;
then we get EXACTLY HALF WAY, just by the half-way mark where we have to push
through…and then we turn back instead citing “I cannot do this / I won’t make
it / I give up” and we give into the pre-programming and turn back. This is
exactly what we do with points where we go into this relationship
of falling-standing the whole time and do not remember the factor of learning
to be able to move forward. So, if we add the learning-factor – we’d be
swimming, and while we’re swimming, as we’re in the process of living change –
we actively / in real time assess what we need to perfect / what we need to
change/specify / how much more preparation do we need; so as we’re swimming
beyond that half-way mark towards the other island – we use different muscles,
we change the breathing, we stabilize the mind, we use the body differently and
we make it to the other island.
So it is / should be in the process of living change as well
– an active/real time process of change; because it is in those/such very
moments where the process of change is busy happening, that instead of
learning, we fall back into the past/pre-programming instead of moving
inward/forward.
We’ll continue with more practical examples in interviews to
come
