Love and Fear Tug of War: DAY 483

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Love and Fear Tug-of-War: DAY 483
The Moment of Shock

Shock, Trauma and Stress (Part Five)

We’ll continue more in the next post – expanding on the point with regards to why/how it is that the “fears” that come up in the mind as the “love” for someone grows, stands in the context of being a ‘warning’ and finally understand why we exist in such an extreme polarity of love and fear in our minds in relation to someone; and what are the consequences and solutions for such relationships and experiences we create within the Mind.

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see, realise and understand that I could never fully comprehend this relationship between Love and Fear, the experience of Love and Fear - as I had not been Aware of how the Mind / Consciousness operate / function and was not Self-Aware to be able to understand my relationship to the Mind / Consciousness and how it leads our ‘self’ / ‘awareness’ into “experiencing / interpreting” life / living and relationships energetically through emotions/feelings instead of actually being grounded within physical reality and in fact living through and as the physical. Meaning – I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see, realise and understand how little my focus / attention in relationship to others had been on how we physically interact, participate and communicate and how much more it was about “how I feel about them / me in relationship to them” within my Mind, where my relationship to them was more defined by how I either positively / negatively reacted towards them in my Mind – in so doing, not presenting myself with the space and time to actually develop ourselves as individuals, expand/grow in how live / behave / communicate with ourselves and one-another as I was always so preoccupied with my own internal reactions / experiences as emotions / feelings / thoughts and backchat.

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to ever question, to the full extent / degree necessary – why/how it is that within/during a relationship, only “Love” is so celebrated, talked about, expressed, discussed etc. whereas, when it comes to the Fears that come up in the Mind of losing / being separated from a ‘loved one’ / ‘someone close’ – such Fears are pushed back as far as possible in the Mind, to not be looked at / introspected / investigated at all. The more the “Love” is pushed forward through how we speak / behave in its presence – the more the “Fear” is pushed back into the depths of our Mind and so we end-up in the ‘tug-of-war’ between the experience and thoughts of Love and Fear in our Minds, within and throughout the entire relationship being pulled this-way and that-way between the experiences and thoughts of Love and Fear.
In this, I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to ever see, realise and understand how on a subconscious / unconscious mind level we have this battle between Love and Fear within our Minds – where our Love for someone will become more intense / overwhelming, the moment the Fears arise in thoughts / projections. Meaning – the moment the Fears / what if’s come up in the Mind of losing someone / missing someone / being separated from someone, we immediately shift into the other Polarity of Love, appeasing our Fears with Love to try and conquer the Fears in the Mind with thinking about / imagining / expressing how much we Love another. But we don’t see / realise / understand how the Fears always seem to return, that we never in fact ‘conquer’ such Fears in the Mind, but only momentarily suppress them when we think / imagine / feel / express the “Love” we have for another person(s). If anything – what in fact comes to pass is that our very Fears materialize / manifest at the end – that we do eventually lose them / separate from them and all that remains in our Minds is memories of how much we Loved them. Then, even still – the memories are accompanied by the loss / grief / sadness and sorrow of their death / separation from us.

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see, realise and understand how / why it is that from the get-go, with approaching a relationship from the Mind within the starting point of emotions / feelings – it exist within the principle “if you know the beginning, you know the end”; meaning: with a relationship starting-off with being defined within and as experiencing only emotions/feelings to/towards someone – such as Love and Fear, a relationship will always be only that “experiencing / feeling” something to/towards that someone and so it will also be in the end when all that is left of them is memories in the mind / memorabilia in reality – every time one think of them / reminisce / see them in photos etc. – one only have experiences / feelings / emotions that come up. Where, the emotional / feeling experiences in fact blind one from seeing the individual as a person, blind one from seeing the life they had lived as an individual and towards/with self, blind self from the gifts they left behind, blind one from what one could learn about their lives / them as individuals, blind one from what one could take as gifts out of their lives to continue living / sharing / expressing with those still in one’s world.

In the next post, we will continue with explaining how emotional/feeling-based relationships in the Mind is causing us to limit who we are in relationship to others, and how this is/has been contributing to the devolution of human beings – because instead of using the time we have on earth together to grow/expand/develop our communication / living, we only base our relationships on energy experiences and do not create ourselves into/as our utmost potential as individuals and together by using relationships as a platform for the evolution of human beings.

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