Love and Fear Tug-of-War: DAY 483
The Moment of Shock
Shock, Trauma and Stress (Part Five)
We’ll continue more in
the next post – expanding on the point with regards to why/how it is that the
“fears” that come up in the mind as the “love” for someone grows, stands in the
context of being a ‘warning’ and finally understand why we exist in such an
extreme polarity of love and fear in our minds in relation to someone; and what
are the consequences and solutions for such relationships and experiences we
create within the Mind.
I
forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see, realise
and understand that I could never fully comprehend this relationship between
Love and Fear, the experience of Love and Fear - as I had not been Aware of how
the Mind / Consciousness operate / function and was not Self-Aware to be able
to understand my relationship to the Mind / Consciousness
and how it leads our ‘self’ / ‘awareness’ into “experiencing / interpreting”
life / living and relationships energetically through emotions/feelings instead
of actually being grounded within physical reality and in fact living through
and as the physical. Meaning – I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and
allowed myself to see, realise and understand how little my focus / attention in
relationship to others had been on how we physically interact, participate and
communicate and how much more it was about “how I feel about them / me in
relationship to them” within my Mind, where my relationship to them was more
defined by how I either positively / negatively reacted towards them in my Mind
– in so doing, not presenting myself with the space and time to actually develop
ourselves as individuals, expand/grow in how live / behave /
communicate with ourselves and one-another as I was always so preoccupied with
my own internal reactions / experiences as emotions / feelings / thoughts and
backchat.
I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself
to ever question, to the full extent / degree necessary – why/how it is that
within/during a relationship, only “Love” is so celebrated, talked about,
expressed, discussed etc. whereas, when it comes to the Fears that come up in
the Mind of losing
/ being separated from a ‘loved one’ / ‘someone close’ – such Fears are
pushed back as far as possible in the Mind, to not be looked at / introspected
/ investigated at all. The more the “Love” is pushed forward through how we
speak / behave in its presence – the more the “Fear” is pushed back into the
depths of our Mind and so we end-up in the ‘tug-of-war’ between the experience
and thoughts of Love and Fear in our Minds, within and throughout the entire
relationship being pulled this-way and that-way between the experiences and
thoughts of Love and Fear.
In this, I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and
allowed myself to ever see, realise and understand how on a subconscious /
unconscious mind level we have this battle between Love and Fear within our
Minds – where our Love for someone will become more intense / overwhelming, the
moment the Fears arise in thoughts / projections. Meaning – the moment the Fears
/ what if’s come up in the Mind of losing someone / missing someone / being
separated from someone, we immediately shift into the other Polarity of Love,
appeasing our Fears with Love to try and conquer the Fears in the Mind with
thinking about / imagining / expressing how much we Love another. But we don’t
see / realise / understand how the Fears always seem to return, that we never
in fact ‘conquer’ such Fears in the Mind, but only momentarily suppress them
when we think / imagine / feel / express the “Love” we have for
another person(s). If anything – what in fact comes to pass is that our very
Fears materialize / manifest at the end – that we do eventually lose them /
separate from them and all that remains in our Minds is memories of how much we
Loved them. Then, even still – the memories are accompanied by the loss / grief
/ sadness and sorrow of their death / separation from us.
I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself
to see, realise and understand how / why it is that from the get-go, with
approaching a relationship from the Mind within the starting point of emotions
/ feelings – it exist within the principle “if you know the beginning, you know
the end”; meaning: with a relationship starting-off with being defined within
and as experiencing only emotions/feelings to/towards someone – such as Love
and Fear, a relationship will always be only that “experiencing / feeling”
something to/towards that someone and so it will also be in the end when all
that is left of them is memories in the mind / memorabilia in reality – every
time one think of them / reminisce / see them in photos etc. – one only have
experiences / feelings / emotions that come up. Where, the emotional / feeling
experiences in fact blind one from seeing the individual as a person, blind one
from seeing the life
they had lived as an individual and towards/with self, blind self from the
gifts they left behind, blind one from what one could learn about their lives /
them as individuals, blind one from what one could take as gifts out of their
lives to continue living / sharing / expressing with those still in one’s
world.
In the next post, we will continue with explaining how
emotional/feeling-based relationships in
the Mind is causing us to limit who we are in relationship to others, and how
this is/has been contributing to the devolution of human beings – because instead
of using the time we have on earth together to grow/expand/develop our communication
/ living, we only base our relationships on energy experiences and do not
create ourselves into/as our
utmost potential as individuals and together by using relationships as a
platform for the evolution of human beings.
