Suicide Paranoia – 14: Suicide and Blame DAY 400

Featured Artwork by Andrew Gable

In and from this post, we’re going to explore the ‘Blame Dimension’ existent within Suicide Paranoia in the Mind. In one of the recent Reptilian Interviews, Paranoia was explained quite well with using an illustration of the extent to which Paranoia cause one to ‘lose touch’ with Reality. How, the Creators of the Human, initially intended the Mind/Consciousness to exist ‘congruent’ with Reality – with Consciousness and Reality ‘existing closely side-by-side’ so that there would not be TOO much of a separation between Consciousness and Reality; for example where one would listen to another’s words – one would still be able to contextually understand what the other person is saying while AT THE SAME TIME, in your own Mind REACTING to their words. Whereas, in Paranoia Possession – one would be listening to what another person is saying, but the ‘reality’ of their Words are not heard, because all one hear/interpret is one’s own Paranoia Possession. Changing the words of another person COMPLETELY in one’s Mind to the extent that it in fact has no reality to what the person in fact said - and so one had, in one’s Mind-Reality relationship – completely moved farther away from the Mind-Reality congruency / ‘close relationship’ and more and more into the Mind. I would suggest investing in these recent Interviews to assist/support more with Understanding Paranoia in the Mind/Consciousness and how to stabilize oneself back into Reality.

Back to having a look at the Relationship between Suicide Paranoia and Blame:

So, when we Blame – we direct our own reactions to something / towards someone else. For most part – Blame is done in anger/revenge, like in our own Minds, when we Blame something/someone – we believe, in a way, that we’re in our own Minds “getting back at them”. Within this, fascinatingly enough – Blame ‘feels good’ to the individual possessed within and as it in the Mind. Especially when the Imaginations can go quite ‘wild’ in terms of what one would Imagine ‘doing TO’ that something/someone because of what ‘they did TO you’. So, the Nature of Blame we’re going to look at here with regards to Suicide – is Blame within the context of ‘anger/revenge/spite’. It’s interesting how many Human Beings who consider/think about Suicide – if one self honestly look at moments when/as this was done, was also done in a way/means to ‘Manipulate’ another, where one would in one’s Mind say: “Yes, wonder what they’d going to do/say if I’d kill myself –that’ll mess with them” / “I’m just going to kill myself and get it over with, let THEM live with what they’ve done to me” / “I’m going to make them suffer, they have to suffer for what they have done, if I kill myself – THEY’RE responsible and I will make everyone know it” and so it can continue. Within this, the individual in their Suicide Paranoia really believe that, by committing suicide – it will in some way have an impact on other’s lives/minds / ‘the One’s that apparently are responsible for their state of Mind/Self’. When, what such Individuals aren’t seeing/realising/understanding is that: No one can Hear what is going on in your Mind…but yourself. No-one else is in your Mind…but yourself. Additionally within this, it’s fascinating how the Mind deals with suicide / those who commit suicide – when it’s done/attempted to be done out of anger/revenge/spite: it doesn’t really in fact impact other’s Minds as they cannot fathom/comprehend/understand how they’d be ‘Responsible’ – they were not in the Individual’s Mind while the Individual was ‘talking themselves into Suicide / the attempt thereof’ to understand what reasoning went on in there for Blaming others for their internal experiences.

And so, Individuals that attempt/try Suicide as a manipulation of other’s Minds/Lives within the context of Anger/Revenge/Spite: really in fact only Spite themselves, Compromise themselves and their own Lives. The Mind/Consciousness of Human Beings are SO BUSY all of the time that, the one that crossed-over will eventually simply become but a Memory in the Minds of the humans left behind, and they will continue living their Lives. It’s like, people try and “get back at others” through committing suicide / attempting to commit suicide – but no else ‘pays the price’, in fact – but Self.

It’s fascinating in this context how the Mind can make one believe that what One “Believe” one is doing to others, through committing suicide / attempting Suicide will in fact affect them/influence them as one attempt/intend to do. I mean, one cannot in any way project how other human beings would react with not knowing how their Minds in fact operate/function and so – the Mind can make Illusion ‘seem REAL’, even to the extent where the Human Being really BELIEVE that what they imagine/self-talk in the Mind is in any way relevant/related to Reality.

Therefore, I would suggest – rather than taking your own life to ONLY IN YOUR OWN MIND take revenge/compromise/spite others, when it really in fact only spite/compromise yourself: to rather Understand how the Mind works with self-talk/imagination and especially emotional-reactions to others, that you do not internalize and suppress all of that and keep it in your Mind, which will only lead to Paranoia and Losing Touch with Reality. But to assist and support yourself to UNDERSTAND your own Mind/Reactions, how to direct your internal Reality/reactions/experiences into Solutions, so that you do not accept/allow others IN YOUR OWN MIND to haunt to, but that you can learn to remain stable/here/directive and not accept/allow other’s words/actions to become Possessions in your Mind that only possess you/compromise you, but to Learn to LIVE YOU so that you don’t in your own MIND lead yourself to an Regret that you’ll really have to live with into the hereafter for how silly you’d been for accepting and allowing reactions, thoughts and imaginations in your OWN MIND to control you, when you could have simply stopped and changed your relationship to it with a Decision, every moment of Breath.

To Understand your own Mind/Reactions and assist/support oneself to be/become the directive principle of/as it and learn what it means to LIVE through releasing oneself from/of Paranoia Possessions of Consciousness – visit Desteni, Desteni I Process LITE.

We’ll continue more in the Next Post

Suicide Paranoia – 13: Self Forgiveness and Self Commitments (Part 2) DAY 399

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see, realise and understand how Suicide Paranoia – from the emotions, to the memories, to the scenes, people and relationships that I blame for why I am in and as the mental state/condition/experience of/as suicidal thoughts/imaginations/tendencies; how Suicide Paranoia creates like a Vortex in my Mind, starting from the tip with an energy and cycling and circling up into the centre-point of my Mind, where all that I see and experience are all the memories/remembrances constantly and continuously circling and cycling over and over and over again, with my awareness stuck and lost in the centre of it all, creating my own ‘black hole’ into and as which I suck myself in realms of my own Mind/Consciousness. Losing more and more touch with reality, what’s real, the breath, my body and in so doing: do not see, realise and understand how Change can manifest in a Moment, where I make a Decision to investigate/introspect my awareness-relationship to what Created this Possessive Vortex of/as Suicide Paranoia in my Mind, where I can stand in stability in the Centre of that Vortex, equipped with the tools of Writing, Forgiveness and Commitments and in and as that stability, re-align my relationship to the things that Haunt my Mind until the Vortex Settle and I have Cleared my Mind and can again See the potential of life that is ME in who I am in every Moment of Breath.

I commit myself to assist and support me, to see, realise and understand that such a Vortex sucking me into a black hole, a dark abyss – is me creating it myself in my own Mind, that can be cross-referenced with having a look at how much and the extent to which I continue participating in the memories, the thoughts, the self talk, the imaginations – over and over and over again entertaining it in the Mind, growing that vortex and sucking myself deeper into and as the black hole/dark abyss, farther and farther away from Reality, making that which I entertain in the Mind stronger and more powerful than my own will/strength.

And so, I commit myself to through writing, forgiveness and commitments – assist and support myself to strengthen my will, my self – substantiate my Awareness into and as a Stand, where I see, realise and understand that with a decision and an action of writing and forgiveness, actually walking it, point by point, starting with what in my Mind, such as memories/remembrances/people/relationships I blame/react to that has been haunting my Mind – facing my own Demons: that within and as and during this Process, I slowly but surely start focusing the attention on me, my stand, my strength and my ability to change and so slowly but surely, start ‘taking my power back’ that I have abdicated to the Mind, through and as accepting and allowing myself to ‘make what comes up in the Mind MORE than me’, instead of seeing, realising and understanding that I have the ability to change me in relation to what I accept/allow to manifest/come up in and as my Mind as me.

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see, realise and understand that: what comes up in the Mind, such as my own demons that haunt me, as memories/remembrances/events/past experiences/relationships/moments – is at this moment only experienced as Overwhelming, because I have given it all more power/influence over/of me; through accepting and allowing myself to substantiate it all, grow it all, feed it all and in fact so Nurture it. Therefore, I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to Nurture ‘me’, my life, my living – but accepted and allowed myself ‘problems and consequence’ to have power over/of me in the Mind, my OWN Mind and so in this – forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see, realise and understand that I am thus responsible for, and the only one responsible for, what I accept and allow to exist / possess/ overwhelm me in and as the Mind.

In this, I commit myself to through writing, forgiveness and commitments – assist and support me to Nurture my Awareness, my stand and live and apply the Decision, to assist and support me to walk through the Paranoia I created in my own Mind, to see, realise and understand how I have nurtured a “Paranormal Realm’ in my own Mind, animated Demons as the things in my Mind that haunts me, and so assist and support myself to face my own creations, change me in relationship to my own Creations so that I can learn what it means to Nurture ME, my LIVING, my LIFE in this REAL WORLD in and as this Physical Existence; by and through simply starting to change my direction, my attention, my focus to who I am in every moment of breath in and as by living participation in and as this Real World, and no more accept and allow myself to be Possessed / Victimized in relationship to paranormal realms/entities/demons/ghosts that I accept and allow to haunt my own Mind and set myself free from the Past and so start focusing on recreating /re-birthing me in and as and through this Process of Writing, Forgiveness, Commitments and Self Corrective Living.

So, within this all – the primary points here to consider with what we have walked in the Forgiveness and Commitment Statements, is to see, realise and understand that one’s Mind only seems overwhelming now, because of the extent/amount of attention you give it ALL of the time, so it seems more “powerful than you” at this stage. But, through Writing, Forgiveness and Commitments – you slowly but surely start strengthening your Stand, your Awareness and will start seeing, realising and understanding that you can Really Change your Relationship to what comes up in the Mind and in so doing: Change yourself. It is one of the most supportive realisations in one’s process – the fact that: I can change through changing my relationship/acceptance/allowance to/as what comes up in the Mind; focusing one’s attention more on finding solutions that creating more problems for oneself in the Mind.

We’ll continue more in the Next Posts

Suicide Paranoia – 7: The Creation Process of Suicide Paranoia (Thought Dimension Part 2) 

DAY 393

Here we’re going to walk the/a practical example to illustrate how energy transforms into thoughts/self talk in the Mind.

Because Human Beings do not Understand how emotional/feeling reactions/energies are created within our own Mind-Physical Relationship, the immediate assumption that exists is that: whomsoever “caused” the reaction/experience within our Mind “is to Blame”. Not realising that, it wasn’t the other person “personally”, but rather what they represented within their words, behaviours, tonalities,  movements, intentions etc. that activated memories and/or knowledge and information to which we reacted to in and as our own Minds. Thus, our reactions was  not so much towards the other person, personally, but more towards what memories, knowledge, information, views, perceptions, ideas and beliefs we hold / define ourselves as within our own Minds. Thus, other parts/pieces of what other humans represent acts like “activations for reactions” on ALL levels of our Minds – the conscious, subconscious, unconscious, quantum mind, quantum physical and physical body itself.

So, let’s walk an example of an individual that had been exposed, throughout their lives, to such moments of reactions within themselves, based on other people’s words, behaviours. So, with all human beings being exposed to reactions in their relationship to others, why do only some go to the extent of suicide paranoia and/or to the extent of actually acting upon it? This has much to do with emotional/feeling ‘sensitivity’. Meaning, where individuals are more ‘sensitive’ to reactions they experience in their Minds/Bodies and so reactions are then more ‘accentuated / intense’ than it would be in others. It’s fascinating within this as well, where – there will be one person with two human beings standing in front of them and say the same thing in the same tonality/behaviour to both of them, but it will affect each one of the two human beings standing in front of them differently. The one, being more sensitive to their own internal reactions, would take it more hard than the other who would be more easily to ‘move the reactions in their mind away’ / suppress it or vent it/exert it in some way or another. Thus, this ‘sensitivity’ of such human beings causes the individual to Internalize their reactions/experiences MORE. Internalize meaning, they would not have any ‘protection/defence’ mechanisms and/or exertion/venting tactics – but would like “take the punches” of words/tonalities/behaviour/body language and “sponge it up within and as themselves”. A Human Being that is Not ‘sensitive’, would have ways/means/methods to ‘deal with’ the reactions in their Minds/their relationships/worlds, the Human Being that is sensitive would not have such ways/means/methods and just internalize it all, sponge it all up, keep it to themselves, within themselves – with no-one/nothing/no support and assistance to direct their own reactions in some way or another. All of this obviously just showing/indicating also how uneducated human beings are within the simple field of something such as Communication and how your words, behaviours, tonalities affect/influence human beings differently/uniquely.

So, with this – the human being then is exposed to reactions in their Mind that within their life start accumulating. Now, they don’t have any other context for their reactions/experiences, but in relation to that something/someone that ‘caused it’. And so, such a human being would ‘take the punches, sponge up the reactions/experience” and then start replaying the memory of what happened within and as the Energy that they experienced it. I mean, imagine, you’re a child, growing up, there’s no Education with regards to our mental processes of thinking, emotions, feelings, imagination and how it works and so the only “relationship” the human being forms eventually with the reaction is “who/what caused it externally”, not realising how the reactions/experiences were caused in their own Mind simply because of not understanding how to effectively deal with one’s own reactions and/or other people’s words and behaviours.

So, what starts happening in the Mind is: the individual then replays memories, events, instances, moments in their Mind – over and over and over again, which from here is where the Process of thinking/self-talk starts emerging. This is also how the Mind of a child develops: starts with energy/energy experiences/reactions, then memories that imprints into themselves from their external reality, from where they reference memories to start forming their relationships, then from memories emerge Imaginations, from where they start ‘changing reality according to their individuality’, and then from memories comes thinking/self-talk. The same happens with the Suicide Paranoia process: the individual, in their energy reactions, starts looking at memories and from those memories starts “activating their imagination”. Where they over and over and over again look at the moments/instances that affected them deeply, and then they TALK about it in their own Minds, start THINKING about themselves, others, their experience and so they are catapulted into a Reality in their Mind where they can completely change what really happened in reality, and even change the way they are, look like, see themselves, experience themselves and so starts the process of losing touch with themselves and so reality and start BELIEVING THEIR MIND more, the memories, the imagination, the self talk and the thinking…until it possess them completely and eventually leading to making the biggest mistake of/as their existence and only when it’s too late, after death, realising what they had done, accepted and allowed in believing illusion in their Mind, more than the reality of their Awareness in every moment of breath.

We’ll continue more in the next post